I wasn’t quite sure what I was doing that late Wednesday night at an improv class I impulsively signed up for. I was warmly welcomed by the inquisitive stares of the eight men in my class. I’m sure they thought that maybe, just maybe, if they stared hard enough, they could telepathically send me a one-liner every once in awhile. And who was I to reject their expertise?
After all, funny women are just such a novel concept. It was in our nature to be sensitive, so how could we possibly make a joke, much less take one?
I knew I would never be the Seinfeld of my generation. So was my decision to be part of this class simply ironic? Was I the ultimate punchline? I was doomed to be that one awkward kid at prom always dancing slightly outside of the circle.
Let’s just play devil’s advocate for a second. Of Wikipedia’s list of “American Stand-up Comedians,” only around 13 percent are women. Perhaps there is no biological incentive for us to be funny. We don’t really have to be funny. After all, reproduction is one of our many female privileges that put men at our beck and call when it comes to a punchline.
I, however, was determined to find an answer, some sort of tangible proof that women were, indeed, funny. So I interviewed 4th year European Studies major and Theater minor Katie Green, a student comedian and proud feminist at UCLA. I was curious to see if a woman’s humor could measure up to decades of dick jokes and tales of masturbation.
Q: What are some female friendly jokes you have?
A: I hate when guys are like, “Oh you’re a girl. Make me a sandwich, make me a sandwich.” Like really, who do you think I am? I’m not a mind reader. What kind of sandwich do you want?
I tag my sandwich joke with like — I started saying that a feminist walked out on my joke, like really, you actually think I’m at home making sandwiches for guys. No, I’m making them three course meals, whatever they want.
Q: Since you’re a feminist, what do you hate about men?
A: I hate when guys are like, “What do you want, what do you want me to do to you?” Can you make this a multiple choice question, I don’t know all my options.
Q: As a woman, are you going to support Hillary in the upcoming elections?
A: Obviously I’m voting for Hillary unless my boyfriend tells me to vote for Bernie.
Q: It must be so hard to make it as a female comedian. Do you really think it’s practical?
A: I came to college to find myself…a husband. I used to tell people my life mission was to be a housewife, but obviously I’m more practical now; apartment wife is fine.
Q: What makes your style feminine? How do you cater to your female audience members?
A: Having the power to say what I didn’t say when I wanted to say — that’s basically a lot of my material. My mom calls me the Taylor Swift of comedy, because I just write about all these guys.
Q: Do boys ever get scared of having “bad blood” with you?
A: I texted this guy once to rekindle the flame and was like “hey” and he messaged me back “Katie, oh my God, that’s crazy. What’s your Netflix account? A girl’s about to come over.” And I was like, “Really, like really, you know I have Amazon Prime.”
Q: You’re pretty funny for a girl, but do you have a backup plan?
A: I hate when sometimes I tell people I want to be a comedian they’ll say, “Oh, but what’s your backup?” and I’ll think that’s kinda offensive, like they don’t think I have what it takes to find a rich husband.
“Are women funny?” This remains the unsolved question of our generation.